


Gamer Girls??? In this economy????

by Kai_Salt



Category: DreamSMP, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Clay | Dream wears a mask, Demon Darryl Noveschosch, Dream is a god (???), Enderman-Ghast Hybrid Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), Fox Hybrid Floris | Fundy, George has simps, Idiots allowed to have a chat, Multi, Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Raccoon Hybrid TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Ram Hybrid Toby Smith | Tubbo, Sheep Hybrid Jschlatt (Video Blogging RPF), Sleepy Bois Inc as Family, So does Skeppy, Space Jam References, Teacher Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), They're Not Human, Tubbo & Jschlatt are siblings, chat fic, implied drinking in the 3 part, schlatts name keeps changing, so basically if they’re non human in canon or in my head canons, they are just vibin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-08
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:42:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28451835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kai_Salt/pseuds/Kai_Salt
Summary: Group chat of idiotsAlso I don't ship the real people if they are uncomfortable with shipping let me know and i will remove ships
Relationships: Alexis | Quackity/Karl Jacobs/Sapnap, Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Eret & GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Everyone & Everyone, GeorgeNotFound & Wilbur Soot, Jschlatt & Toby Smith | Tubbo, Jschlatt & Wilbur Soot, Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Zak Ahmed/Darryl Noveschosch
Comments: 7
Kudos: 388





	1. Welcome to the show

_[DreamWasTaken added 13 people to the chat]_  
_[DreamWasTaken names the chat ‘gamer girls’]_

**2:36 am**

**DreamWasTaken:** I have gathered you here today

**Wilbur Soot:** why

**Quackity:** Why did you call us gamer girls  
**Quackity:** you know they aren’t real

**DreamWasTaken:** if you let me speak I’ll tell you

**Sapnap:** no ❤️

**Technoblade:** why am I here? i have potatoes that need farming

**Sapnap:** I thought the war was over

**Technoblade:** it may be over but I have to stay in first place

**DreamWasTaken:** Don’t you dare, you bitch

**Technoblade:** speaking of me in first place  
**Technoblade:** how are you dream

**DreamWasTaken:** blocked have a horrible day

**GeorgeNotFound:** Shut the up, too early for this

**BadBoyHalo:** George go to bed >:/

**GeorgeNotFound:** I was asleep  
**GeorgeNotFound:** but SOMEONE made a group chat

**DreamWasTaken:** Hello, gogy, love of my life, King of my heart, my e-boy who I’m a tier three sub to ❤️❤️❤️

**GeorgeNotFound:** I’m going back to bed

**DreamWasTaken:** NO!!!!!!!!

_[GeorgeNotFound left the chat]_

_[Dream added GeorgeNotFound to the chat]_

**Sapnap:** Stop flirting in the chat

**Technoblade:** Dream, why don’t you simp for me like that???????

**DreamWasTaken:** I’m sorry  
**DreamWasTaken:** I moved on

**Technoblade:** too late, I’m simping for other people now

**TommyInnit:** GUYS SCHOOL IS IN LIKE A FEW HOURS!!!!!  
**TommyInnit:** GO TO SLEEP!!!!!!

**GeorgeNotFound:** k

**DreamWasTaken:** Georgie, don’t leave me with them

**GeorgeNotFound:** I’m literally in the room next to you, go to sleep

**Wilbur Soot:** you gays done talking  
**Wilbur Soot:** *guys

**Technoblade:** speaking of gays

_[Technoblade added Jschlatt to the chat]_

**Wilbur Soot:** it’s my pretty princess

**Quackity:** MR PRESIDENT!!!!

_[Quackity changed Quackity to Mr Thicc]_

**Jschlatt:** bro I was just eating a hot pocket  
**Jschlatt:** don’t contact me while I’m eating a hot pocket ever again

**Philza:** whoever goes to sleep the fastest gets to leave school early

**Jschlatt:** I’m too busy with my cryptocurrency business to go to school  
**Jschlatt:** I’m a good $9000 in debt

**Philza:** Okay everyone but Schlatt is involved

**DreamWasTaken:** Night y’all

**GeorgeNotFound:** shut up

**Sapnap:** Night

**BadBoyHalo:** sleep tight

**Technoblade:** Sleep? And let squid kid beat me at potato farming? I think not

**Wilbur Soot:** Sleep!!!!

———

**8:17 am**

**TommyInnit:** WHY HAVE YOU GUYS MADE ME TOO TIRED FOR SCHOOL??????

**TubboLive:** maybe if you went to bed earlier you wouldn’t be tired

_[TubboLive changed TubboLive to Tubbo]_

**TommyInnit:** I DID!!!

**Philza:** Wilbur, you’re not going to school today  
**Philza:** The other teachers know, I’m also taking the day off

**Dream:** WHAT???? THAT IS SO UNFAIR!!!

**TommyInnit:** YEAH WTF DAD!!!

**Philza:** I’ll tell you later, just trust me.

**WilburSoot:** haha! Get fucked all of you!!!

_[DreamWasTaken changed DreamWasTaken to Dream Weaver]_

**GeorgeNotFound:** horrible name, I’m blocking you

**Dream Weaver:** B’(

**Technoblade:** What is that emoticon???

**Dream Weaver:** that’s me crying with my sunglasses  
**Dream Weaver:** don’t be rude

**Sapnap:** just because he’s going through something doesn’t mean he can’t look cool

**Logan from BTR:** Who the fuck changed my name!??  
**Logan from BTR:** never say that I look like Logan from Big Time Rush again

**WilburSoot:** You don’t even look like him anymore tbh

_[WilburSoot changed WilburSoot’s name to Wilbur]_

**Wilbur:** anywho, guess who’s got a surprise for y’all when school is over

**Dream Weaver:** I swear to god if it’s something stupid, I will kick your ass

**Nikichu:** Don’t be mean to Wilbur or I’ll fight you

**Wilbur:** Hi Niki!!

**Nikichu:** Hi Wilbur!!

**Logan from BTR:** Why don’t you talk to me like that Wilbur

**Wilbur:** I did and you told me never to talk to you like that again

**Tubbo:** Hi Niki!!!  
**Tubbo:** Hi Wilbur!!!  
**Tubbo:** Hi Schlatt!!!!!

**Logan from BTR:** Hey kid

**Nikichu:** TUBBO!!!

**Wilbur:** Hi Tubbo

**Tubbo:** :D

**Logan from BTR:** Are you ready for school?  
**Logan from BTR:** I’m dropping you and Tommy off today

**Tubbo:** :D!!  
**Tubbo:** Yeah I’m ready for school and Tommy just got here

**Wilbur:** Why are you dropping off Tubbo??

**Logan from BTR:** cause I’m Tubbo’s best brother????

**Wilbur:** Wait I thought you were joking about that  
**Wilbur:** Tubbo’s parents actually adopted you????

**Tubbo:** Yep

**Logan from BTR:** Some is us care for our siblings, Wilbur

**Wilbur:** Just because I once dared Techno to eat a whole 16” pizza in 10 mins and he almost choked doesn’t mean I don’t care for my siblings

**Technoblade:** you called??  
**Technoblade:** also if you make tommy disappear, i’ll pay you handsomely schlatt

**TommyInnit:** MY LIFE ISN’T WORTH MUCH SCHLATT!!!  
**TommyInnit:** IT’S NOT WORTH IT!!!!

**Logan from BTR:** How much?

**Technoblade:** i have a beyblade, a bunch of old keyboards and the option to hire my services whenever

**Wilbur:** WHAT SERVICES????

**Logan from BTR:** Hush Wilbur, the adults are talking business

**TommyInnit:** TUBBO DEFEND ME FROM YOUR BROTHER!!!

**Tubbo:** If you kill Tommy, I’ll make all of your choccy milk without love >:/

**Logan from BTR:** …  
**Logan from BTR:** Techno, I’ve have received a counter offer that makes it impossible for me to accept

**Technoblade:** i understand

**Philza:** Techno, stop trying to get Tommy killed

**Technoblade:** well schlatt didn’t accept

**Philza:** Also off your phones, you should be in school by now!!


	2. Ice cream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bit OOC but I don’t care, it’s my birthday

**3:56 pm**

**BadBoyHalo:** I don’t like rooming with George, Dream and Sapnap

**BadBoyHalo:** They’re all noisy and George screams the loudest 

**Wilbur:** 0.0

**BadBoyHalo:** They also started playing without me, even though they know I love minecraft :(

**Wilbur:** Oh you’re talking about minecraft 

**Blades:** Of course Wilbur, there will be no sinning in this good Catholic group chat 

**Wilbur:** Techno, why are you talking about Catholicism????

**Technoblade:** That’s not me

**Blades:** Who the fuck changed my name again?

**Blades:** At least I’m not Logan from BTR anymore 

**Wilbur:** SCHLATT??????

**Blades:** Looks like I’m blades again

**Tubbo:** Hello!!!!

**Wilbur:** Hi Tubbo

**Blades:** Hey kid

**TommyInnit:** T-MONEY!!!!

**Blades:** Tubbo, eat your ice cream or I’ll take your phone off you

**Dream Weaver:** Why are you at the ice cream parlour?

**Blades:** because I want to get ice cream

**Blades:** mind your business

**Dream Weaver:** @GeorgeNotFound

**Dream Weaver:** If I buy you ice cream will you kiss me?

**GeorgeNotFound:** Depends

**Sapnap:** Dream I’ll kiss you for free

**Dream Weaver:** but I want Gogy kisses

**Wilbur:** I also want Gogy kisses

**Blades:** :(

_ [TommyInnit changed GeorgeNotFound to Gogy] _

**Gogy:** Tommy, I don’t care if you are a child

**Gogy:** I will drop kick you

**Dream Weaver:** Drop kick me Georgie ❤️❤️❤️

**Gogy:** …

_ [TommyInnit changed Dream Weaver to Gogy Simp] _

**Gogy Simp:** Jokes on you, I’m the only George simp 

**Sapnap:** Yeah, then why do I exist????

**Gogy simp:** Fight me for the Gogy Simp title

**Eret:** George, if I buy you an ice cream will you kiss me?

**Gogy:** Yeah cause you’re not Dream or Sapnap

**Eret:** Gogy kisses for me, y’all wish you were me

**Wilbur:** why is it so weird to see Schlatt care for something that isn’t money????

**Wilbur:** _ [Image of Schlatt and Tubbo laughing] _

**Blades:** Delete this!!!!!

**Tubbo:** Is that a cat with you Wilbur????

**Wilbur:** Yeah

**Gogy:** What about the rest of us??????

**Gogy:** I WANT TO SEE THE CAT!!!!!

**Gogy Simp:** Yeah!!!

**Wilbur:** You can see her when you come round my house

**Gogy:** please dm me pictures of cat :(

**Wilbur:** George I just said you can see her when you come over mine

**Gogy:** _ @Gogy Simp _

**Gogy:** Wilbur won’t let me see pictures of his cat, please do something

**Gogy Simp:** What do I get out of this?

**Gogy:** I’ll give you a kiss

**Gogy Simp:** LETS GO!

**Gogy Simp:** Wilbur I’m on my way

**Wilbur:** WHY ARE YOU SUCH A SIMP????

**Wilbur:** Fine I’ll send gogy cat pics

**Gogy:** see that wasn’t so hard

**Eret:** @gogy I HAVE ARRIVED!!!

**Eret:** What ice cream do you want???

**Gogy:** I THOUGHT YOU WERE JOKING!!

**Eret:** I WOULD NEVER JOKE IF I GET GOGY KISSES!

**Gogy:** I’LL BE THERE IN A SEC!

**Gogy:** ALSO I WANT ROCKY ROAD!!!

**Eret:** Got ya

_ [Sapnap changed Eret to SimpEret] _

**SimpEret:** Jokes on you

_ [SimpEret changed Sapnap to Simpnap] _

**Simpnap:** That’s fair

**Skeppy:** whish bad owuld kisss me lkie that :(

**Gogy:** glad to see auto correct working once again

**Skeppy:** tahts a tinhg

**BadBoyHalo:** I’ll help you turn it on Skeppy! <3

**Skeppy:** ❤️

**Gogy Simp:** JUST KISS ALREADY

**Gogy Simp:** IT’S SO OBVIOUS

**Simpnap:** says you

**Gogy Simp:** WAIT

**Gogy Simp:** IF BAD IS HELPING SKEPPY WE CAN ALL CURSE!!!!!

**TommyInnit:** FUCK

**Gogy Simp:** SHIT

**Gogy:** BITCH

**Tubbo:** FUCK

**BadBoyHalo:** LANGUAGE!!!!!!

**SimpEret:** @gogy

**SimpEret:** I GOT YOUR ICE CREAM NOW KISS ME

**Gogy:** I’m almost there

**Gogy Simp:** Where are my Gogy kisses?

**Gogy:** If you don’t hurry up then I’ll have to give Eret yours

**Simpnap:** WHAT ABOUT ME????

**Gogy:** 🤢

**Skeppy:** This is cute and all but Dream told me to kiss Bad and that’s wahat im gonna do 

**BadBoyHalo:** YOU DON’T HAVE TO

**Skeppy:** But I’m gonna

**Gogy Simp:** imagine pining for someone who literally likes you back

**BadBoyHalo:** You can’t say much you muffin head

**Philza:** WILBUR WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GET A CAT FROM????

**Philza:** THAT IS NOT HIS SURPRISE BTW

**Philza:** WTF!!!

**7:56 pm**

**TommyInnit:** TUBBO, HOW DO I FIXMY LAPTOP?

**Tubbo:** I’m a lawyer, not a computer scientist 

**Tubbo:** Thank you auto carrot, god bless you

**TommyInnit:** YOU ARE NOT A LAWYER, BIG Q IS

**Tubbo:** :(

**Mr Thicc:** I am no longer a lawyer, Tubbo is

**Tubbo:** : D 

**TommyInnit:** I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS

**Gogy Simp:** We’re just going to skip over “auto carrot”, huh?

**Tubbo:** :(

**Tubbo:** Schlatt, I’m being bullied and I don’t want the blood on my hands

**Addict:** Of course, I understand

**Addict:** Okay, who the fuck is changing my name?

**Gogy Simp:** I’m looking back and no one is doing it

**Addict:** God really has it out for me smh

**Addict:** my cut out of the Pope isn’t helping

**Wilbur:** Your fucking WHAT?

**Mr. Thicc:** It’s all fun and games until you’re making out with Schlatt and just see the Pope looking at you

**Addict:** we have never made out, stop these lies 

**Addict:** but I mean I wouldn’t complain, look at these lips 

**Addict:** _ [picture of Quackity] _

**Addict:** I would pay a lot to kiss him

**Mr. Thicc:** you can kiss me for free rn

**Addict:** DM this instant 

**Simpnap:** That’s literally my boyfriend????

**Simpnap:** Wtf?????

**Addict:** It’s okay, I’m not gay so it doesn’t count

**Simpnap:** Oh okay lol

**Simpnap:** also please keep socks on

**Gogy Simp:** Isn’t Karl your boyfriend???

**Simpnap:** I have two hands Dream

_ [Simpnap added Karl Jacobs to the chat] _

**Karl Jacobs:** Hello!

**Simpnap:** 🥰🥰🥰

**Mr. Thicc:** 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

**Mr. Thicc:** I love him more

**Simpnap:** actually I do

**Karl Jacobs:** this is why I hang out with Jimmy at lunch

**Gogy:** LMAO!!!!

**Gogy:** Also Quackity?

**Mr. Thicc:** Sí

**Gogy:** Stop calling me

**Mr. Thicc:** But I want to hear your voice 🥺🥺🥺

**Gogy:** No

**Gogy Simp:** Yeah you tell him!

**Gogy:** You need to stop sending me dumbass texts, Dream

**Gogy Simp:** heart been broke 💔 so many times 🕐 I don’t know 🤷♂️ what to believe 😔😔😔😔

**Karl:** George be drowning in simps

**Simpnap:** Not his fault he’s so pretty 

**Gogy:** …

**Gogy:** I’m leaving 

_ [gogy left the chat] _

**Gogy Simp:** heart been broke 💔 so many times 🕐 I don’t know 🤷♂️ what to believe 

_ [Gogy Simp added Gogy to the chat] _

**Mr. Thicc:** George please slide into my dms so I can find a man to treat you right

**Mr. Thicc:** dream doesn’t deserve a man like you 

**Gogy:** Ask me to DM you one more time, I’ll drop kick you

**Mr. Thicc:** But Gogy, I gotta Simp 

**Gogy:** No

**Simpnap:** My boyfriend is simping for another man, I can’t believe this

**Simpnap:** I got cucked in the gc 

**Mr. Thicc:** It’s not like that, I promise babe

**Addict:** Quackity, please bring back baby Yuto

**Mr. Thicc:** Who?

**Mr. Thicc:** Oh that fucking cooking mama baby

**Addict:** please

**Addict:** He’s my son

**Tubbo:** Please, Quackity

**Tubbo:** Schlatt is upset and now so am I 

**Mr. Thicc:** I might set it on fire

**Addict:** THAT IS MY SON YOU ASSHOLE!!!!

**Mr. Thicc:** I apologise

**Mr. Thicc:** do you wanna set him on fire

**Addict:** not yet

**Simpnap:** I WANT TO COMMIT ARSON TOO

**BadBoyHalo:** NO ONE IS DOING ARSON

**Philza:** YOU ARE NOT MY CHILD BUT I WILL PARENT YOU IF YOU DECIDE TO COMMIT ARSON

**Philza:** …without a responsible adult there to help you

**Simpnap:** …

**Simpnap:** Philza minecraft does arson???

**Philza:** Yeah

**Simpnap:** WOW! YOU’RE LIKE SO COOL!

**Wilbur:** STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD!!!!!!!

**Simpnap:** WILBUR, I’M TRYING YO GET ADOPTED HERE!!!!!

**Gogy Simp:** @Karl Jacobs 

**Gogy Simp:** Come get your mans

**Karl Jacobs:** Nah

**Philza:** Wilbur, I kinda want to swap you for Sapnap

**Wilbur:** Bro what?

**Philza:** Mate, he doesn’t eat sand 

**Simpnap:** can confirm 

**Wilbur:** biased

**Simpnap:** *based

**Wilbur:** I’m gonna kick your arse mate

**Simpnap:** He’s going proper British now

**Addict:** QUACKITY!! THIS IS NOT A FUCKING JOKE PLEASE GIVE ME MY CHILD BACK!!!

_ [Addict changed Addict to Papa Schlatt] _

**Papa Schlatt:** Please quackity 

**Papa Schlatt:** @Philza 

**Papa Schlatt:** Help your fellow Hexxit Hombre out here

**Philza:** …

**Philza:** I haven’t heard of the Hexxit Hombres in a long time

**Papa Schlatt:** Phil, you know I wouldn’t ask you if this wasn’t serious. 

**Wilbur:** Are you two RPing in the gc??????

**Wilbur:** Cringe

**Papa Schlatt:** Wilbur, this is a private conversation

**Papa Schlatt:** Please mind your own business 

**Wilbur:** YOU ARE IN THE GC!!!!

**Philza:** Wilbur please stay out of this conversation

**Philza:** We are adults here

**Wilbur:** SCHLATT IS LITERALLY THE SAME YEAR AS ME, HE JUST DROPPED OUT!!!

**Papa Schlatt:** PHIL!!! 

**Papa Schlatt:** I WANT THAT TWINK OBLITERATED!!!!

**Wilbur:** @Gogy

**Wilbur:** He’s the twink here!!!

**Gogy:** I WILL KICK YOUR FUCKING ASS!!!!!

**Philza:** WILBUR BEHAVE OR I’LL KICK YOU FROM THE CHAT!!!

**Wilbur:** YOU CAN’T KICK ME IF I LEAVE

_ [Wilbur left the chat] _

**TommyInnit:** FUCK YEAH!!!!

**Papa Schlatt:** Baby Yuto is safe at home now

**Papa Schlatt:** Safe for now, that is


	3. Party Rock

**6:35 pm**

**Mr. Thicc:** Gogy!

**Gogy:** What

**Mr. Thicc:** Tell Dream to leave me alone

**Gogy:** No, you probably deserve it

**Simpnap:** Lmao 

**Mr. Thicc:** GEORGE!!! PLEASE!!!

**Mr. Thicc:** @Karl Jacobs

**Karl Jacobs:** :)

**Mr. Thicc:** Sapnap won’t save me from Dream so he doesn’t deserve the nuggets you brought 

**Simpnap:** WAIT

**Simpnap:** GEORGE TELL DREAM TO STOP!

**Gogy:** What do I get out of this?

**Simpnap:** ANYTHING!!!

**Simpnap:** Unless it’s something gross

**Mr. Thicc:** HE HAS GOTTEN INTO MY DORM AND IS DEMANDING SPACE JAM TO BE PLAYED 

**Gogy:** Goodnight!

**Karl Jacobs:** It’s not even 7 yet

**Gogy:** I said goodnight

**Simpnap:** HE’S OFFLINE

**Mr. Thicc:** NO! 

**Technoblade:** I can help

**Technoblade:** Dream, your boyfriend is messaging me about fighting you

**Gogy Simp:** I am busy watching Space Jam rn, shut the fuck up

**Technoblade:** okay I got nothing 

**Mr. Thicc:** @gogy

**Mr. Thicc:** Please help

**Mr. Thicc:** Wait, I got an idea

_ [Mr. Thicc changed Mr. Thicc to Mexican Dream] _

**Mexican Dream:** George, please tell regular Dream to get out of my apartment 

**Gogy Simp:** Quackity, this is pathetic

**Gogy Simp:** also George isn’t my boyfriend

**Gogy:** …

**Gogy:** please leave quackity alone

**Gogy:** He won’t stop messaging me and I’m trying to sleep

**Gogy Simp:** anything for you Gogy

**Gogy:** where’s Wilbur?

**Gogy:** He’s got our fucking project 

_ [Gogy Simp added Wilbur to the chat] _

**Gogy Simp:** there he is

**Gogy:** Listen here, you fucking bitch of a musician. I will not fail this class because of your incompetence, am I understood?

**Wilbur:** what if I don’t bring in the project tomorrow?

**Gogy:** I will steal each of the organs you have two of to make your life just that little bit harder

**Gogy:** I’ll also break your nose

**Wilbur:** Hot

**Gogy Simp:** Hands off my man

**Gogy:** You’re my Simp not my boyfriend 

**Gogy Simp:** Close enough

**Simpnap:** George, stop flirting with two men in the group chat 

**Gogy:** Sapnap, I will fucking castrate you

**Simpnap:** Kinky 

**Gogy:** I will make it absolute agony for the rest of your life

**Mexican Dream:** Gogy hot when threatening

**Philza:** If one more of you put some dumbass comment I’ll get your teachers to give you extra work

**Philza:** Except George, I don’t want to try my luck with an angry Londoner today 

**Gogy:** Shut the fuck up Phil, you’re a Northerner so your opinion is invalid

**Nikichu:** George, that’s not nice

**Eret:** Kick his ass George 

**Gogy Simp:** British people fighting, let’s go 

**Hackerman:** I gotta see this

**Philza:** Mate, you’re just being a dick on purpose now

**Gogy:** Maybe tell your son to stop being a cunt then

**Hackerman:** …

**Hackerman:** Minx, give George his phone back 

**Gogy:** Fine but I’ll get him to add me to the chat

**Hackerman:** Absolutely not

**Gogy Simp:** So how much was actually George and how much was Minx?

**Gogy:** If it helps, Minx helped me threaten you but she ended up taking my phone to write it herself 

**Gogy Simp:** Threaten me next time Georgie ❤️

**Gogy:** Oh, a second person who wants to be castrated?

**Gogy Simp:** If you castrate me, we can’t have kids babe!

**Gogy:** First of all, that’s not how that works

**Gogy:** Second of all, bold words of someone who hasn’t shown anyone but Sapnap their face yet

**Simpnap:** OH!!! HE GOT YOU THERE!!

**Gogy:** You bitches are too much, me and George are gonna get some coffee

**Simpnap:** Bro, why does George keep giving Minx his phone, I like violent George more 

**Gogy:** @Nikichu

**Gogy:** Me and Minx are getting coffee, wanna come?

**Nikichu:** Yeah okay let me get my stuff

**Gogy:** Minx will message you the address 

**Tubbo:** I want to go too but I goy homework 

**Tubbo:** *got

**Nikichu:** It’s okay Tubbo, I’ll get you a cookie 

**Gogy:** Also Puffy is going to be there, couldn’t because she’s studying 

**Hackerman:** Why are you hanging out with the girls?

**Gogy:** Cause Minx is dragging me along to the coffee shop and has invited people so I’m inviting Niki and Puffy do at least I know some one therevhisbktsvrao

**Gogy:** gnfawimstjb

**Simpnap:** he got taken out

**Gogy:** No, it’s because I love Minx and I’d do anything to make her happy at Dream jealous. 

**Hackerman:** Minx, we know that’s you

_ [gogy added JustAMinx] _

**JustAMinx:** I’m here bitches

_ [hackerman kicked JustAMinx] _

**Gogy:** She’s going to steal my phone again

_ [Gogy added JustAMinx] _

_ [JustAMinx kicked Hackerman] _

**Tubbo:** Now add Wilbur back!

_ [Nikichu added Wilbur] _

**Wilbur:** Where is Schlatt?

**Wilbur:** I have a few words for him

_ [nikichu added Hackerman] _

**Hackerman:** Before you say anything, do you know what they call me?

**Wilbur:** What do they call you?

_ [Hackerman changed Hackerman to Mr knife] _

**Mr knife:** Don’t fuck with me

_ [Tubbo changed Tubbo to Mr Crimes] _

**Mr Crimes:** Or me!!!!

**Mr knife:** Yeah don’t fuck with us or we’ll say some shit

**Wilbur:** I see being a criminal runs in the family 

**Mr knife:** Wilbur I’ve once had to bail you and Tommy out of jail

**Mr knife:** Also I’m pretty sure I once stopped Techno going to jail

**Philza:** FUCKING WHAT!

**Simpnap:** Didn’t you once punch a parent, Phil?

**Philza:** They attacked me because I said that I wasn’t going to accept a bribe to raise their kids grade up because he said some transphobic shit

**Fundy:** Dadza said trans rights

**Philza:** Where the fuck have you been?

**Fundy:** Doing hot guy shit

**Philza:** Okay

**Simpnap:** Please can I be adopted by you?

**Philza:** Why? You’d have to live with Tommy

**TommyInnit:** ME AND SAPNAP ARE COOL! I LIKE HIM!

**Simpnap:** Tommy is cool

**Karl Jacobs:** When your one of your boyfriends won’t move in with you and want to be adopted by your teacher instead 

**Mexican Dream:** Karl please let me move in 🥺

**Karl Jacobs:** You just want me for my monster collection 

**Mexican Dream:** being broke is hard 

**Gogy Simp:** We just gonna ignore Phil punching people?

**Simpnap:** Yeah let’s talk about how cool Phil is

**Philza:** It was self defence and I got suspended and had to go on a class on how to “deescalate heated parents”

**Philza:** Absolute bullshit

**Mr knife:** Can we add more drama to this chat, I want to gossip to Charlie Slimecicle about something?

**Mexican Dream:** You got it

**Mexican Dream:** @skeppy

**Mexican Dream:** Bad said he’s my best friend and that he hates you

**Skeppy:** Yeah?

**Mexican Dream:** Yeah he told me that he likes me more than you

**Skeppy:** @BadBoyHalo

**Skeppy:** Is this true?

**Mexican Dream:** Yeah 

**BadBoyHalo:** Geppy, I like you more than Quackity 

**Skeppy:** Yeah?

**BadBoyHalo:** He’s not my best friend, you are!

**Mexican Dream:** He called you a muffin head

**Skeppy:** Bad literally kissed me on the cheek like 5 minutes ago

**Skeppy:** You’re just lying 

**Mr knife:** actually this is boring

**Mr knife:** Charlie, me and Ted are just gonna do breaking and entering 

**Mexican Dream:** I’m sorry for starting drama with you Skeppy

**Skeppy:** K

———

**11:53 pm**

**Gogy Simp:** Y’all know where George is?

**Nikichu:** He’s with me and Minx

_ [Nikichu changed Nikichu to Niki <3] _

**Gogy Simp:** Okay, I just thought it was weird he spent hours getting coffee

**Minx:** wwete at avfuckibf paety 

**Niki <3: ** We’re at a party 

**Minx:** Yah thatbtoo

**Niki <3: ** Minx stop messaging 

**Gogy:** Hey Bitches 

**Gogy Simp:** George, when are you getting back to the dorm?

**Gogy:** Uh, idk but I’m literally going to kiss you once I get home

**Gogy Simp:** …

**Gogy Simp:** What?

**Gogy:** You fucjing heard me

**Karl Jacobs:** Hahaha! He’s drunk

**Gogy:** Karl, come fuvking drimk with me!

**Niki <3: ** I can message you the address if you want, bring others if you want

**Wilbur:** What the fuck is a Jell-O shot?

**Gogy:** Irs shot but jelly

**Gogy:** its

**Technoblade:** Horrible grammar, I’m gonna commit a crime if this continues 

**Gogy:** Boo, you won’t even come to the party?

**Technoblade:** What do I get out of this?

**Niki <3: ** There’s potato salad 

**Technoblade:** You have my attention and I might show up

**Mexican Dream:** Hey, Karl just messaged me the address and it’s literally down my street

**Mexican Dream:** How did I not notice that there was a party?

**Gogy:** You’re not that awear Quackity 

**Technoblade:** Someone get this man away from his phone

**Gogy:** Suck my ass, bitch boy

**BadBoyHalo:** Please stop swearing 

**Gogy:** go kiss Skippy or something 

**Skeppy:** Lmao 

_ [Skeppy changed Skeppy to Skippy] _

**Minx:** Spneone stop Geode from trying to fig ht peopke 

**Gogy Simp:** I’m going to make sure George doesn’t do anything stupid 

**Mexican Dream:** Oh fuck, there is a lot of people at this party 

**Gogy:** Quackity!!!!! I can see you!!!!!

**Mexican Dream:** George, why the fuck are you standing on a table

**Minx:** Wete simginh backstret boy s

**Simpnap:** Not even a BTS song

**Wilbur:** George has taste

**Wilbur:** Also me and Charlie Slimecicle are gonna sing some Blink-182

**Mexican Dream:** I know you’re here Dream, I can fucking hear Space Jam

**Gogy Simp:** suffer :)

**Wilbur:** Fundy, get here now

**Wilbur:** Me and Quackity are going to sing that one Katy Perry song cause Charlie chickened out

**Fundy:** …

**Fundy:** Okay but be aware I have a knife 

**Wilbur:** noted

**Home wrecker:** Minx can’t sing for shit and neither can your boyfriend, Dream

**Home wrecker:** Whoever is doing this, pray I don’t find out because I’m owed a favour from Techno

**Gogy Simp:** George isn’t my boyfriend lmao 

**Home wrecker:** You and George are like friends in the same way that Bad and Skeppy are friends smh

**Philza:** Stop messaging the chat until tomorrow it I’ll give you all double the work

**Philza:** Also I wanna hear about the drunk stories tomorrow 

**TommyInnit:** SHUT UP OLD MAN

**TommyInnit:** Also can you ask Mumza if she has money I can have?

**Philza:** sure

**BadBoyHalo:** I’m going to add some people I met at the party

_ [BadBoyHalo added 4 people] _

**Gogy Simp:** finally someone else knows how to mass invite

**AntFrost:** can’t believe that you didn’t add us sooner Dream

**Gogy Simp:** How did you know I was Dream?

**AntFrost:** …

**Simpnap:** He and George are literally the only two people who don’t know

**Gogy:** Stip talkin g shite about Geogre 

**Minx:** You have my fucking phone

**Gogy:** Phone swap 

_ [Gogy changed Gogy to Twink] _

**Minx:** Noooooo!!

**Twink:** Shut the fuck or ill fuck ya dad

_ [Minx changed Minx to Schlatt Simp] _

**Home wrecker:** disgusting 

**Twink:** I’ll fucking fuc k ya dad

**Schlatt Simp:** like he talks to me lmao

**Twink:** Bro

**Gogy Simp:** Please give your phones back

**Niki <3: ** I’m on it!

**Home wrecker:** How does George have so many Simps and women?

**Gogy Simp:** He plays minecraft, left handed and colour blind 

**Gogy Simp:** Standards are low these days smh

**Karl:** Pick a struggle lmao 

**TommyInnit:** George, I can help you kill the women or I could marry them for you

**Twink:** No

**BadBoyHalo:** AHHH!!! WHY ARE THE LIGHTS OFF!!!!

**Technoblade:** couldn’t sleep

**Wilbur:** we don’t live near them

**Fundy:** …@Simp Eret 

**Fundy:** Are your eyes fucking glow in the dark

**Home wrecker:** Says the fox hybrid 

**Simp Eret:** Says the ram hybrid who is like 4’5 when in his full ram form

**Home wrecker:** Don’t call me out like that

**Home wrecker:** It’s not funny

**Mexican Dream:** Imagine only being able to shapeshift into human or animal forms

**Mexican Dream:** Couldn’t be me

**Fundy:** We get it Quackity, you shape shift more than we can

**Philza:** Time for bed I guess

**Philza:** Or else


	4. New faces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I’ve been busy with school so have this I guess

**7:42 am**

~~~~

**Twink:** Who’s bed did I wake up in?

**Twink:** and why am I in dinosaur onesie 

~~~~

**An E-boy:** Is the pope there?

~~~~

**Twink:** I don’t think so

~~~~

**An E-boy:** not my room

**An E-boy:** Next person to change my name will be executed 

~~~~

**Twink:** Who has an adult sized Lightning McQueen bed?

**Twink:** Why can I now hear music?

~~~~

**Philza:** That’s Tommy’s old room

**Philza:** You and Wilbur walked back to our house, with the dinosaur onesie on and fell asleep when dropping him off

~~~~

**Simpnap:** You literally stole Karl’s old onesie that was left in my room, how did you get it?

~~~~

**Twink:** Drunk me can do anything 

~~~~

**Technoblade:** I saw him him down a two litre bottle of sprite before passing out yesterday so I can believe that

~~~~

**Twink:** It’s good for hangovers 

**Twink:** my headache is almost non existent 

~~~~

**Wilbur:** Fuck you, I had those fucking jelly things that were baby shaped and drank a fuck ton less than you did and my head is killing me

~~~~

**Twink:** Sucks to be you I guess

~~~~

**VelvetIsCake:** Who are you guys and why am I here?

~~~~

**Gogy Simp:** Bad invited you

~~~~

**VelvetIsCake:** oh hey Dream!

~~~~

**Gogy Simp:** What the fuck?

**Gogy Simp:** How do you and Ant know it’s me?

~~~~

**VelvetIsCake:** …

**VelvetIsCake:** call it a hunch

~~~~

**Wilbur:** Someone come kidnap me

**Wilbur:** Philza is trying to get me to visit my mum

~~~~

**TommyInnit:** THE SAMSUNG SMART FRIDGE???

~~~~

**Wilbur:** FUCK YOU!!!

~~~~

**TommyInnit:** FIGHT ME BITCH BOY!!!

~~~~

**Technoblade:** They’re fighting 

**Technoblade:** I’m going to join in the because I can

~~~~

**Philza:** Wilbur, you’re not seeing your mum until next week?

~~~~

**Twink:** He’s busy fighting 

~~~~

**Philza:** Break the fight up?

~~~~

**Twink:** Not my kids

~~~~

**Philza:** you’re in my house 

~~~~

**Twink:** You’re not my dad

~~~~

**Philza:** I’ll give you some pocket money 

~~~~

**Twink:** …

**Twink:** Okay

~~~~

**Mexican Dream:** WAIT UNTIL SAM HEARS ABOUT THIS!!!!!!

~~~~

**Twink:** DO NOT TELL HIM!!!!

~~~~

_ [Mexican Dream added AwesamDude] _

~~~~

**Mexican Dream:** DAD!!!! GOGY IS TRADING YOU FOR A NEW DAD!!!

~~~~

**AwesamDude:** What?

~~~~

**Mexican Dream:** Scroll up!!!

~~~~

**Twink:** DON’T

~~~~

_ [Twink changed Twink to Georgie] _

~~~~

**Georgie:** FUCK I MISSED TYPED!!!!

~~~~

**AwesamDude:** Why are your friends simping for you?

~~~~

**Georgie:** I’m good at minecraft 

~~~~

**AwesamDude:** Be home by dinner tonight or no minecraft 

~~~~

**Georgie:** I live in a dorm

~~~~

**AwesamDude:** then do what you want 

~~~~

**Philza:** Please get home safely 

~~~~

**AwesamDude:** Please stop telling my child what to do

~~~~

**Philza:** Then don’t be a bad parent

~~~~

**AwesamDude:** Like you’re a better parent 

~~~~

**Philza:** My children are completely fine, all four of them

~~~~

**AwesamDude:** You have 3 children 

~~~~

**Philza:** I can count, the 4th one lives in Japan 

~~~~

**AwesamDude:** You couldn’t keep your first three from fighting 

~~~~

**Philza:** Fuck you

**Philza:** also the lemon bars you bring to the PTA meetings aren’t even that good

~~~~

**AwesamDude:** You’re chocolate cake is so dry that I have to drink it with hot coffee

**AwesamDude:** The coffee burns my taste buds so I don’t have to taste the cake

~~~~

**Philza:** You fucking take that back

~~~~

**An E-boy:** Imagine being a good dad

**An E-boy:** couldn’t be me

~~~~

**AwesamDude:** Also you probably don’t know how to grill

**AwesamDude:** Goodbye Philza Minecraft 

~~~~

**Gogy Simp:** GEORGE!

**Gogy Simp:** MY LOVE!!! 

**Gogy Simp:** WHERE ARE YOU????

~~~~

**Georgie:** I’m talking to Wilbur 

~~~~

**Wilbur:** I’m Gogy’s favourite Simp 

~~~~

**Gogy Simp:** He doesn’t like being called Gogy

**Gogy Simp:** Only I get to call him that

~~~~

**Georgie:** Anyone calls me Gogy again, I’ll set Minx on you

**Georgie:** Except Wilbur, he can call me Gogy 

~~~~

**Gogy Simp:** @Simpnap

**Gogy Simp:** I’ve been broken up with 

~~~~

**Simp Eret:** Lmao, more George for us then

~~~~

**Gogy Simp:** I’m calling my mom

~~~~

**Simpnap:** It’s okay I have her number on speed dial 

~~~~

**Gogy Simp:** Okay

**Gogy Simp:** Wait

~~~~

**Simpnap:** LMAO!!!

~~~~

**Niki <3: ** Don’t be mean, Sapnap!

**Niki <3: ** Or I’ll commit arson on you 

~~~~

**Simpnap:** I’m sorry Niki

~~~~

**Captain puffy:** Why did you guys wake me up? 

~~~~

**Niki <3: ** Hello Puffy! Bad added you here!

~~~~

**TommyInnit:** HEY PUSSY!!!

**TommyInnit:** *PUFFY

**TommyInnit:** I MEANT PUFFY!!!!!!

~~~~

**An E-boy:** Ew

~~~~

**Mr. Crimes:** HI PUFFY!!!!

~~~~

**BadBoyHalo:** :3 hello!!!!

~~~~

**Captain Puffy:** Oh! Hello everyone!

~~~~

**Slimecicle:** Who are you people and how did you get in my phone?

~~~~

**An E-boy:** BAD YOU STUPID LITTLE SHIT, I CAN’T TORMENT CHARLIE WIRH THIS CHAT ANYMORE!!!

~~~~

**BadBoyHalo:** You’re welcome!!

~~~~

**Mexican Dream:** What the fuck Bad?

~~~~

**1:27 pm**

~~~~

**Skippy:** Bad :(

~~~~

**BadBoyHalo:** Yeah?

~~~~

**Skippy:** Where are you?

~~~~

**BadBoyHalo:** I’m walking Rat!

~~~~

**Skippy:** …

**Skippy:** @technoblade

~~~~

**Technoblade:** ??????

~~~~

**Skippy:** Go to prom with me

~~~~

**BadBoyHalo:** NOOOO!!!!!

~~~~

**Technoblade:** …

~~~~

**BadBoyHalo:** Geppy!!!! I’m almost home!!!!

**BadBoyHalo:** I can give you cuddles in a few minutes!!!!!

~~~~

**Technoblade:** What would I get if go to prom with you?

~~~~

**BadBoyHalo:** Broken bones :)

~~~~

**Technoblade:** …

**Technoblade:** Bad you are the only thing that strikes fear into me, good job

~~~~

**BadBoyHalo:** Awwww!! Thank you!!!!

~~~~

**Gogy Simp:** Private chats exist 

~~~~

**3:23 pm**

~~~~

**Mexican Dream:** @TommyInnit

**Mexican Dream:** I’ll give you $20 if you drink this potion I got off some random guy

~~~~

**TommyInnit:** OKAY

**TommyInnit:** WHERE ARE YOU?

~~~~

**Mexican Dream:** Me, George, Karl and Tubbo are at the park

**Mexican Dream:** Schlatt is somewhere

~~~~

**TommyInnit:** ON MY WAY

~~~~

**Wilbur:** I’m coming along 

~~~~

**TommyInnit:** WHY????

~~~~

**Wilbur:** So I can take a video of it

~~~~

**Slimecicle:** Can I join? I’m just a slimy boy

~~~~

**Wilbur:** For that comment, no

~~~~

**El Presidente:** agreed 

~~~~

**Slimecicle:** You literally can’t say shit, you’re a computer scientist who can’t figure out how his name keeps changing

~~~~

**TommyInnit:** PHIL!!!!!!!!! BIG Q GAVE ME A POTION AND NOW I HAVE CAT EARS!!!!!!!

~~~~

**Wilbur:** WHAT?!? 

~~~~

**Georgie:** It’s raccoon ears and tail

~~~~

**Mexican Dream:** Lmao 

~~~~

**Captain Puffy:** Where is my wife?!?

~~~~

**Minx:** You literally can’t be married

~~~~

**Niki <3: ** I’m here!!!

~~~~

**Minx:** …

**Minx:** @El Presidente

~~~~

**El Presidente:** No

~~~~

**Georgie:** @Minx

**Georgie:** We can go on a minecraft date

~~~~

**Minx:** George likes me

~~~~

**Wilbur:** Someone has to I guess

~~~~

**Georgie:** I’ll get Dream to kick you 

~~~~

**Gogy Simp:** You want Wilbur gone? Like right now?

~~~~

**Wilbur:** Simp alert 

~~~~

**Gogy Simp:** Says you

~~~~

**Minx:** George let’s go on our minecraft date now

~~~~

**Georgie:** Okay, we can speedrun minecraft if you want or we can build a house

~~~~

**Minx:** Lets make a cottage!! 

~~~~

**Georgie:** Okay let me get the blocks!!

~~~~

**Gogy Simp:** >B(

~~~~

**Technoblade:** Ugly

~~~~

**Gogy Simp:** Says you

~~~~

**6:34 pm**

~~~~

**Philza:** TOMMY HAS WHAT?!?


End file.
